Saudi Aspects by Barie Fez-Barringten

Saudi Aspects
By Barie Fez-Barringten

Experiences with specific features of the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia bonded us to our hosts. The heat, sand, weather, souks, corniche, parks, airport, Safeway, malls, sidewalks, eating, prayer call, and driving are amongst the key activities and elements, which we all dealt with on a regular basis. I will not list the government or regular police because we did not have regular contact with them. Unlike many I did have a great deal of contact working for and with Saudis. They were my employers, students and teachers, friends and hosts; adversaries and surrogates; source of income and threat of financial loss.


Our very first glimpse of Saudi was from the same airport we finally departed for the last time. However, when we departed we were filled of a treasure of memorable fragrances, tastes, faces, names, vocabulary, and customs. I would be one of American guys that lasted for two decades and had won the respect of the Saudis for giving more than I got and sharing their world.

Sharing their pride and their shame; sharing their strengths and their weaknesses and enduring their admittedly backward and dysfunctional society. We shared in their rich customs and traditions and learned to respect and understand that they are as much a victim of their culture and its' limitations as many other people with their traditions and customs. All of this took place amidst aspects of Saudi which are described below.




Heat:
The heat combined with humidity was our immediate first impression as we came off the plane on our initial arrival at the Dhahran airport 2:00 A.M., August 11, 1981. The impact was immediate and overwhelming, permeating one's cloths and resting on the skin. One does not walk fast in such a heat. This is the heat with which we lived until we relocated to Riyadh but returned to in 1991 till 1999. It is a heat, which produces a huge amount of condensation on windows, roofs and car’s windshields. It pervades the climate for at least six months and then dramatically subsides making ways for six months of beautiful spring-like weather. The climate changes other than the excessive temperatures and humidity are much as Floridas'.

During the day the combination of sun and humidity produces dangerous conditions, which warrant caution and keeping indoors. If going out, one should be brief and well covered. It’s the kind of condition, where petrol stations permits keeping the car and the air conditioner running while filling up and cars running when parked to keep cool. The air conditioner is a very valuable and necessary item. Indeed there are other methods the Arabs have invented for keeping the air flowing which is a an giant rectangular air exhaust shaft on the roof in the center of the house opening to below to facilitate cross ventilation. This, along with shrubs and palms keep traditional houses comfortable. However, apartments and villas occupied by over ninety five percent of the population rely upon air conditioners. The most inconvenient air conditioners we experienced were in the Bin Jumah building where we resided for the first and the last eight years of our stay. They were always broke and getting spare parts was very difficult. This difficulty compounded by our building janitorial and mechanical crew being subject to give priority to repair Monsour Bin Jumah’s residence. As a result we were constantly communicating with the repair people to find a moment to fix our units.
It also, affected our life style having to use the rooms that were air-conditioned. The noise of air conditioners working is pervasive and a welcome sound where ever you go.
Corniche/Strand/Waterfront/Beach.

Summer or winter, the attraction to either the Red Sea or Arabian Gulf in Saudi is irresistible and an occasion for recreation and escape from the normal desert. Living on either coast is considered a very big plus. We scuba dived with the ARAMCO dive-group off of a small Gulf Island north of Jubail in 1982. We saw many various colored tropical fish at a sight where there was a boat wreck and sponge encrustation’s. We took many photographs off of which Christina made a painting of the boatman.

We were raided and searched by the coast guard but were let to go about our business after a while. Seeing the Arabia Sea from the air displays geodetic plates which explains the shallow water for such a great distance from the shore and why big boats can only marginally sail in the center of the gulf from one end to the other. From the air the plates are like my cardboard site model cutouts in segmented amebic form layers jutting out from the land to the sea overlapping and undulating. The water is so clear you can see all the way to the center of the sea when it gets dark and blurred because of the depth. There are also wild birds and one time we saved a mature crane by calling and managing to get the wildlife preservation to capture and restore the crane. He was stranded on the Khobar corniche. We also swam in the Red Sea as part of a weekend vacation where we stayed at the Red Sea Hotel.

The corniche changed over the total period of time we lived in Saudi. From 1981 to 1988 the eastern province shoreline was undeveloped and the numbers of any Arabs using the beach to swim or picnic was nil. In this early period we swam in the Arabian Gulf’s very warm and calm waters every weakened. When we moved from Rahima to Al-Khobar we would drive to Mina and Ed’s and sleep over their house. We did this only in the summer when the water was warm. At first they lived out side of the ARAMCO camp and later moved in to there own two-story villa. They were superb hosts and we loved them and our visits. Not surprisingly, they always cooked Persian food and the combination of swimming; eating and amiable conversation made our recreational time just lovely.

The corniche of Al-Khobar was rough and crude sixth black sand and even sunset beach was unusable and brackish. We never would visit the Al-Khobar Corniche and only drove to sunset beach to see the salt lakes and dunes. When we moved to Seaview our house was directly on the water, but soon the dredging for landfill began. By the time we returned to reside again in the eastern province the landfill was completed, a new seashore highway built and beautiful seaside parks built in Dammam, Al-Khobar and Sunset Beach. Even Jubail, which we had visited and stayed at the Sheraton (now Holiday Inn) Hotel to swim in the Gulf in 1982, was now fully developed and complete with boating and locker facilities.

Khalid and my Syrian friends who helped me buy my Buick also bought me to swim in Sunset Beach portion of the Gulf. It was incredible to see the way the Arabs had discovered and used the facilities. Of course all the taboos of males and females exposing themselves prevailed and they dressed in cumbersome black ling pants and the women in full dresses, etc. Even more spectacular were the changes in Ras Tanura, which was now well occupied by various Arabs, including Saudi Arabs. They not only swam, but also walked along the corniche full covered in Abayas and other large dark colored capes. It was awesome. Because of there presence, gone were the bikinis and open western style dress. Now where should westerners go to swim?
The University and the US consulate opened up a beach for expats only. The University’s was still conservative and restrictive while the consulates were well guarded and open. A private company opened up a beach house and welcomed expats. That was pretty interesting and I knew these two brothers personally, as they were Azmi’s neighbors in the Khoderi Building in Al-Khobar.

The other aspect of the corniche, which was the one we used most often, was the alKhobar Corniche Park. A former KFU student was its' project manager and I was able to get first hand details of its' design. He gave lectures at our AIG/ME meetings showing slides of the way it was formed by rocks, dredging, etc. When Christina was not in Saudi I would walk and sit on our bench at least once if not twice daily. I’d bring my bible, walk and sit on the bench and read.
Occasionally, a young Saudi ARAMCO fireman named Khalid would sit on the rocks opposite me and discuss so many things including his beliefs in Islam and his ideas of democracy, etc.
Topics, which made a lasting impression on me and my understanding of Muslims and Arabs was his theory of why incest is superior then the western system. He claimed it was superior because of the deaths it causes due to inbreeding. It is the deaths of weak siblings that ultimately yielded a superior, stronger and ultimately healthier race. That is why incest amongst the Arabs was a basic practice amongst Saudis. It is what Khalid taught me. I argued for weeks with him but he was sure I was mistaken and this fundamental belief was why the race of western people are not as strong as Arabs.

He liked to exercise his English with me. At the time he learned that I was suffering from some sickness he gave us a gift of a large and expensive jar of honey. Then there were the many cats who befriended us and whom we fed daily. For a few years there was one cat and her children who when she heard us coming from far would come running so as to walk, purr and rub up against us. She was so sweet and Christina and I would be faithfully there each evening or morning to feed her and her children. Her children grew and so did the others. I had a special blanket and pillows we kept in the trunk of our car for a cushion and protection to sit on the bench.
Occasionally we sat on different benches depending on the direction of the sun and views of the sky, birds, etc, There were often flocks of migrating birds and the others which lived in t the trees. When I worked for the University I could come in the weekday mornings and would meet an older Saudi gentleman dressed in his sparkling clean white thobs who took his walk on my route daily. We always nodded and greeted each other: "Becher”, etc. We’d go in the winter so Christina could get sun and light. In the day it was usually empty so we could sit in private and get the sun. We’d always talk about so many things, and when she was not with me I’d make recordings and we’d listen and speak on tapes.

The evenings were so wonderful when the lights went down we’d sit around the side facing the road and see the colorful vertical reflections of the road lights. On our usual bench we could see the reflections of the whole city in the water. Occasionally we’d see the birds.
I noticed the way the trees aligned them and wanted to photograph or paint what I saw but did not. Likewise I wanted to photograph or paint the women with there children. The women in there black Abayas and the children in there special western play cloths; the little girls with frilly dresses and the boys in pants and shirts. I dare not!

There was a windy season when the families would come out with their kites and another time when a vendor came with his decorated camels and gave the children rides. In the evenings and weekends the whole family came out with pots of food and the barbecue fires were going radiating the smells of kebobs, chicken, stakes, etc. I always managed to park in the same place, right next to the start of the circular path; a path which meandered with the five fingers jutting out into the sea. Often we would casually chat with fisherman and see the catches of the day. From our apartment we could see the restaurant called the Casino. We even ate there occasionally.

Occasionally I used their rest room. One day a university official named Ghazi took some of the faculty who were working on the campus plan for a nice dinner. There was a new fish restaurant that opened where you weere invited to select the fish and order how it should be prepared. The manager and I had a big squabble, which I finally won after several years about the bright floods light he used to highlight his building. It also killed the nice peaceful views of the streetlights. Finally, he turned them off. I did also complain to my Saudi students in the municipality.

To us the corniche was an extension of our apartment and besides the occasional alternative visit to malls etc, the corniche was our destination of choice.
Another part of the Arab Gulf we loved visiting was an Island off of Dammam in which fishing boats were stored and used by Indian and Arab fisherman.

I was able to take the most extraordinary photographs of the boats when the tide was very low with them stuck in the sand.

They are beautiful hand-built Dhows and the fishermen who sail them are living in this Island.
A dhow (Arabic,داو) is a traditional Arab sailing vessel with one or more lateen sails. They are primarily used along the coasts of the Arabian Peninsula, Pakistan, India, and East Africa. Larger dhows have crews of approximately thirty, while smaller dhows typically have crews of around twelve.Up to the 1960s, dhows made commercial journeys between the Persian Gulf and East Africa using sails as their only means of propulsion. Their cargo was mostly dates and fish to East Africa and mangrove timber to the lands in the Persian Gulf. They sailed south with the monsoon in winter or early spring and back again to Arabia in late spring or early summer. The term "dhow" is also applied to small, traditionally-constructed vessels used for trade in the Red Sea and the Persian Gulf area and the Indian Ocean from Madagascar to the Gulf of Bengal. Such vessels typically weigh 300 to 500 tons, and have a long, thin hull design. Also, it is a family of early Arab ships that used the lateen sail, on which the Portuguese likely based their designs for the caravel known to Arabs as sambuk, booms, baggalas, ghanjas, and zaruqs.

Badan - a smaller vessel requiring a shallow draught.


I had several students living on this Island and over the years visited and watch it as the little fisher village deteriorated and even the famous Turkish Fort finally was let totally destroyed by the weather.
We were able to meet the most extraordinary man, Ali Ibrahim Al-Darorah, who has dedicated himself to the restoration and preservation of his village and its artifacts.

It is with his sentiment and love that I too am writing this report to preserve, at least in print the images and beauty of a world, which is deteriorating.










Years before we visited the place and took photographs of the beautiful nets they use to fish. Today, they still use the same nets.




There is an artist, Ali Al-Saffar, living on the Island who is painting the boats and landmarks.

We have a collection of all their books and leaflets along with handwritten descriptions and recollections of current residents.
I was hoping someday someone would be interested to see these photographs and know about this tiny island in the Arabian Gulf called Tarout Island off the coast of the Qatif oasis.It is inhabited predominantly by Shia Muslims. The known history of this island goes back to over 5000 years ago.





Desert:
Unlike the Bedouins and our boys and girls in the military we spent little time directly in and on the desert. In all the time we lived in Saudi, probably more sand came into our rooms through cracks in the windows,doors and air conditioners then we directly experienced. The exceptions were our drives to and from Riyadh and especially when we drove on the desert with our Oldsmobile. Oh how wonderful that was.

The guard at Sea view took us to specific destinations and we got hooked on this thrilling experience. It was like being in a speedboat. You have to keep up your speed and you bounce and glide over the short dunes as you would over water. We would visit various ruins in the desert.


The other desert experienced we had was visiting the Rub Al-Kali (Empty Quarter or red desert) with an ARAMCO cargo plane. It was all red sand and we walked and slid down the dunes.
We traveled on a cargo plane,landed on salt flats and were driven to the camp in dune-buggies . We were fed in air-conditioned factory manufactured buildings. It was splendid. Another tremendous experience was being taken by Mohammed to his family’s desert farm. There we danced with the farmers and shepherds; we experienced a sandstorm, known as: "Shammal” and saw a large flock of camels, a large mixed flock of sheep and goats. This was an exciting event which we were able to video tape and later add music.

Other events included a trip with the “hash Harriers” where we walked over sand in the desert of the eastern province. I have worked in the desert as the project engineer building a sports park stadium for the Presidency of Youth welfare and when I first arrived and worked for ARAMCO many of our facilities were located in the desert. Many of the concerts we attended were at compounds in the desert.


UPM is in a desert context and many of our friends had desert locations. The desert is one of God’s awesome creations.



Just as the Alps, Rockies, and other mountains; as the Sea and lakes, as the tundra on the plains and the great coasts of South Africa’s Cape Town or the ocean drive on the California coast. The desert is awesome both from the air and land. It welcomes, forbids and inspires. It can be a place of tragedy as it was for our friend Roger Standish who died on his desert-trek. Its’ sands can sand blast a windshield and fill a car’s motors.


Social customs include the one where when invited for a meal one talks and drinks and converses for a very long time; however, after completing the very big feast one politely gets up washes and leaves.

The other, is the custom of visiting someone while he may be entertaining another and be kept waiting, even they’re in their presence until he has completed. Related to that custom is “custom” being invited and visiting but not returning the favor? The host is using you to build his Harem and majalis without really having any regard for you personally but only as a measure of his accomplishment and power.

So while you may be invited and entertained very well by your host, he will rarely return the visit. I also noticed this custom reaching Europe and America with my relative’s.
So long as I called and visited my parents welcomed us; but they would not call or write to us. Yes, in response to a call or letter, but they would not initiate a contact. I always regarded this as dysfunctional social behavior.

Accurately, the Saudi religious authorities and writers have published many articles about the negative influence of commerce on the spiritual and family life. On the other hand, these urban commercial institutions and natural wonders is the key to life and distinctive urbanity of Saudi. It is in their complaint and thought that I find my self in perfect agreement that urbanity and its operational elements are opposing our spiritual nature and reality. Indeed they are worldly and becoming even more worldly. The argument goes back to the time of John the Baptist and the Essennes whose idea of holiness was separation from the mundane and fleshly nature of the world However, the bible teaches: "to be in, but not of the world".

But the concern is real and the epidemic is growing as Saudi now has met the franchise craze and begun to add Popeye, McDonald's, Wendy, Piza Hut, etc. chains to the shopping malls and strips. Suks are being engulfed with modernity and the restaurants and hotels are only growing in number and quality. All of this has been further exacerbated by the world wide web, cell phones and international travel However, it all of these things in contrast and combination which gives Saudi its unique and peculiar urban identity: the freedom of pedestrian movement and limited relations between the sexes and restrictions on meetings, etc is off set by these other strong natural and commercial elements.

It is where the “UR”-like Arabic derivative nature manifests and we see the stirrings of vitality and life in a kingdom, which has no public movie theaters (but, every home had a video and rented and bought tapes); no nightclubs, dance halls, orchestra, dance halls, and other forms of public entertainment, Suks in Saudi Arabia are one of the urban landmarks of each major community and defines the city context as urban.

Although the characteristic of each souk is distinguished by the characteristics of its city geographical and ethnic mix but they are all similar. I can only describe the ones we have visited which are located in Jeddah, Riyadh, Car Souks, Dammam, Khobar’s women’s souk, Al Khobar and Abquiq. The souk is where you not only see a plethora of goods displayed but also have opportunity for the most intense urban transactional communications you will face in your entire life. I have further analyzed this experience in my essay on "Ambulating".




Proprietors beckon and make claims about you and their products as you pass and if you slow or stop they continue to size you up and discern your personality and nature. It is a constant exercise in flirting, recognition, and open scrutiny. It is here that all the taboos governing women to men and men to women break down. Shopkeepers will beckon abaya-clad ladies as well as men. Of course they have a special treatment for the non-Arab or foreigner. The souk defines the Arab Urban context in its social framework being the place where the religious police tolerate open interactions so long as the rules are followed.
The most dominant rule is that women are fully covered. If they’re not they will scold and hit the disobedient. These events are the cause of much controversy and government intervention. It is of interest to no one when the Mitawas get over zealous or carry out their duties with too much enthusiasm.
One ambulates through a souk slowly so as to see the many displays, which are usually grouped by product types.
This model of grouping permeates most of the Arab planning of commercial centers; so all the carpets, dresses, luggage, appliances, crafts, foods, etc will be grouped together. In this were vendors competing about price and, design, size, color, etc?

When you get a price on an item is understood that you will continue shopping and haggling. The one you buy from usually realizes you are with him because his is the “last price” lowest of all; or, perhaps the same as others except that you may like the way he behaved or presented his articles.
Many traders will offer and serve you hot Saudi coffee out of a traditional pitcher into very tiny coffee cups. The coffee looks like tea. It is clear and taste somewhat sour. It is probably sweetened and usually you will be very please to have a chance to rest and enjoy the coffee and the hospitality. Of course, this helps to induce your ability to buy at his place.


The Jeddah suuk is mixed between traditional Jeddah buildings and is covered with a beautiful and huge tent like covering. It meanders but has a main concourse lined with out door coffee shops and humbly bubblies. The Dammam Suk is in downtown Dammam behind the governor’s palace. It is within buildings and totally covered in carpets and wares. Like the Riyadh site you can amble away from the souk and into the normal market, the Riyadh souk in separate building and under the highway overpass. This is the souk in which I bought my wife’s abaya that I insisted she wear. She bought and began wearing them under protest.

These souks and the many markets are different from each other. The many retail shops strewn throughout each city are not souks and no bargaining is normal in these places with notable exception. The downtown shops for electronics are simply a matter of going from one to another for the lowest price offered, once reached the last proprietor will often lower his price below his competitor to win your business. The ladies souk is peculiar in that male shoppers are not welcome and discouraged unless you are obviously an older and married man shopping to buy something for your wife who does not happen to be with you at the moment. Maybe she is home or out of the kingdom, but certainly walking down the streets and potentially talking to the ladies is a “no-no” ("harem").

The car souks are an auction-taking place on the desert where there are hundreds of dealers and many sales and repair shops. The cars are brought in and parked and can be seen prior to the evening auction. These events are daily and dynamic. All over the area there are gauntlets where you can drive or the car is drive by standing still and racing the motor and testing the brakes and the transmission. If the car passes your test you make an offer, which is either accepted or rejected. If accepted the seller and buyer goes to one of the huge shops which has an agent who for a standard fee transfers the title, get the plates, etc. the car is paid in full there and he keeps the car. Once all the formalities are complete you call each other and get the car.
Another kind of souks about cars is the auto repair souks, which I have detailed in my description of Thugba. Suffice it to say that the car repair souks in Jeddah, Riyadh and Thugba were about the same. One metal building after the other with dirt floors and many streets in which you can find repairman and parts for just about any make and model of car or truck. The repairman are from all over the planet and they can take disassemble and reassemble and automobile part in any car. This includes engines, carburetors, transmissions, starters, etc.
I know because I have spent countless hours watching and waiting while they repaired the many problems with my cars.


There are Safeway’s all over the kingdom. Now there are many other supermarkets, which have recently opened and serve the public as an American or European supermarket. Stores such as Euromarche and Giant have expanded their basis of operations but still Safeway is still the best.
However, it is more famous for being a center of urban activity in each of the cities, a place where westerner’s can find other westerners, etc. The brands are familiar to European and US shoppers and there are Saudis who like wise like the brands and style of shopping. Safeway must observe the Salah times and therefore must either close or lock you in during the Salah period. Many have been the time when we had arrived a bit too early and had to wait outside parked in our car with other s waiting for the Safeway to open. It is the Safeway I have often met people who I have not seen for a long time. Surrounding each Safeway are shopping centers and restaurants catering to the western tastes.

If you like to eat and dine out Saudi Arabia is the place to live. Regardless of the city, men alone or with other men and women with their husbands will find an endless supply of excellent five star, gourmet, or greasy spoon simple kitchens to eat. Restaurants are located in hotels compounds, shopping centers, corniche, universities and company work compounds, and of course in the souks, market places, etc. The bakeries are subsidized and excellent for any Arabic bread (khoubz araby). Of course the staple, pita in white or wheat is served right from the special ovens where you can watch this balloon-like breads coming out and standing before they're wrapped and sold to you. Unless it is baked in these ovens it is not khoubz araby. Then there is zata and other coverings, which can be, applied; there are the different national breads which have very special seasoning such as Iraqi, Lebanese, Persian, Indian (japouti), etc. We even found a bakery in Riyadh that had fresh German bread made by a German baker with German ingredients.

Our favorite places were various Chinese and Indian restaurants, Oberoi hotel, Marriott Hotel, Meridian Hotel, Silver Tower restaurant, Al-Ghosaibi Hotel, and USMTM clubs.
There are broasting restaurants, preparing fish, beef and chicken and many chicken and rice take out restaurants, Arabic Lebanese banqueting restaurants are both indoor and out as the Oasis restaurant in Eastern Province which is no longer operational, ARAMCO dining halls, KFU dining hall, Saudi British Bank dining hall, street kebob and Shwarma stands (a shwarma is khoubz araby around chicken or beef with slices and mayonnaise), Hyatt hotel dining, Dhahran International Hotel dinning room, special banquets and halls, Riyadh Intercontinental hotels dining halls, and so many others just too numerous to mention. The many buffets where you eat all you can is a Saudi tradition in most of the hotels, camps and community centers. And, of course the hospitality of many friends who prepared great meals In there homes for every country in the world including Philippines, Eritrean, Pakistani, Indian, Egyptian, French, German, Italian, Persian, Korean, etc. People who have not been abroad always ask about the food expecting our answer to be one thing when it is the other.

Living as a pilgrim in a city and on this planet but separate and a part from the “sticks and stones” of this earth has been learned and cultured. I have been weaned away from co- dependence on society, man and world.

In doing this I have been become independent and borderline “anti-social”. I am really very careful not to be unequally yoked or dependent upon man and his institutions. At an early age I became “objective” and clinical. However, I am still thrilled and can recall Manhattan in Central Park in the snow. I remember its stillness and smell. I can see the condense clouds I breath and feel the cold on my cheeks. I am in of the world and yet the world I know is beautiful and lovely. I am glad God has given me so much to experience of His world and I‘d welcome these perceptions again, but I am neither those things nor perceptions of those things. My value is based upon God’s values and gifts not man’s trophies.

Communications:
As we were in Saudi before computers were household utilities as part of our organizing AIG/Me we bought a business fax machine with a built in answering machine. We communicated by Fax to each other when Christina was out of the kingdom. We had bought a fax machine at Del Tura as well. We faxed to all the AIG/Me board and members to invite them for meetings, etc. I used the fax for job searches to sent letters and resumes and when I had the trouble transferring my Igama it was use to send documents. When we got ready to leave we used the fax to advertise the sale of our personal effects. It was priceless communicating to USA and vice versa for registering our students and keeping up with their grades.

We had several phones throughout the apartment and in the last year had access to the Internet and our own email address. Christina communicated a great deal by cassette tapes where I would record while many things in progress and she would listen and the respond. We were able to delve deeply into a variety of subjects and save a lot of money on long distance telephone calls. Many in kingdom calls were kept brief and in code when discussing our Christina events because there was always the possibility that our calls were screened by the religious police. We were even able to listen in on others people’s conversations that had cell phones.

Saudi Arab had heart attack on plane
I was sitting on the aisle and across from me was a Saudi Arab together with many ladies in abaya and face gear with a few babies in the center aisle. He was a chain smoker and they did not stop eating and talking. Later in the evening when we were all sleeping suddenly the ladies screams rang out and I reached across and sure enough the man had stopped breathing I shouted for the steward, the light were snapped to full brightness and from somewhere an expert in heart attacks appeared fully equipped to rescue and save the man’s life. The dying man did not speak English but we were able to communicate. I later talked to the heart medical expert who told me that he was on this flight heading for another location. It was the Saudi man’s good fortune.

Guess what, later, after the man had recovered and breakfast was being served, he took out a cigarette and began smoking. I scolded his women and him. He put it out.
But a half-hour later he was back to chain smoking. I stood over the clan and talked to them and told them that “God had rescued him and that they should now take care. There answer to me was something along the lines that if he was to die it would be God’s will so he will continue smoking. Later I again saw the medical rescue man and encouraged him to see his new patient. He did, and then told me that he sees this all the time.


The in-between places in Saudi Arabia
Riyadh
The Indian Restaurant between Airport and Sateen, accessible only from University because so many of the streets ended at the sidewalks of Sateen; Bari Paul originally introduced the restaurant to me. It was hard to get to and mysterious set in an Indian neighborhood. There were many such places all over Saudi Arabia and for different times and occasions. The fact is that we learned to live in Saudi spending a lot of time and effort on life support and social circumstances. I resided in the Batha Hotel; in the Riyadh hotel when our apartment was not ready; in the Marriott Hotel on visiting form ARAMCO and then when we started at IA; at the Al-Khosama hotel and at the Intercontinental when visiting with Tawfiq when I worked for Al-Muhaidib. I ate in every Royal Chinese restaurant in the kingdom including the first one in Riyadh next to the zoo in Riyadh. Bob Vinton and I had a lunch there where I basically had a job interview with him; he was over one hour late.

The Riyadh Equestrian Club is where we had our Yale University Club meetings.
The Japanese restaurant in Riyadh is where we spent one New Years Eve and is where we ran into the Pollen’s doing the same thing. In a variety of Chinese restaurants in Riyadh in a base of an big office and apartment building in the Batha; another China Royal in Olaya; a big Chinese restaurant in Olaya; our favorite in Olaya where they served a wonderful sesame oil soup similar to the noodle soup we got in the basement Chinese restaurant in Al-Khobar and the Shanghai restaurant in down town Al-Khobar.

Between 1984 and 1988 Bassam’s bakery was where we bought German rye bread and rolls. They also sold cakes and many different German cold cuts, coffee and smoked fish.
It was a wonderful place located in its own building in front of Aldrees office and filling station on the Dammam /Riyadh Highway at Sateen Street. I learned just where to park which was at the curb. Reluctantly I’d park in the provided parking area, which was more trouble. We’d often arrive during prayer and have to wait outside. They later added a second story for cloths, etc. Unfortunately when we returned to visit Riyadh in 1992 it was closed.


Riyadh Women’s Group:
Christina and I enjoyed the many meetings and diner parties with a lady who was its' president and good friend, Freda Stephanidoros.

Her husband Milton was the head surgeon of a military hospital and they lived in a large villa. They were Greek and nominal Christians. The club met monthly in an elaborate “conference Palace” in Riyadh where I and/or our houseboy would bring and collect Christina.




The final meeting which ended the club’s existence featured a Syrian American who had married a Saudi and she showed in detail the eating and cooking habits of the family.
By the time the meeting closed police and religious police were waiting to escort the presenter to jail and some of the leaders to detention.
I recall whisking Christina away to the safety of our nearby villa. Later Christina and Freda remained close friends and tried to do what ever they could to have gatherings of women, couples, etc.

Christina held parties at our villa and encouraged other executives to do the same.










The Al-Khobar Corniche Fish Restaurant (Al-Sanbok Seafood Restaurant)
Newly built on the rocks jutting into the Gulf was the strange shaped building? Of course we all heard and saw it and son we too visited. They had a long counter with a wide variety of fresh fish exhibited, which customers selected and they prepared to your instructions. The service was excellent any even had buffets. They offered our favorite shrimp tempura, which we’d order and eat till we were busting. The Matre’d been Egyptian and the waiters and cooks were from Pakistan and other Arabs. They then added the brightest halon light to the exterior, which destroyed the view from the benches near the restaurant. I complained but the Matre’d refused to remove them. Finally after I bought it to the attention of the Saudi engineer in charge of the corniche it was finally removed. The engineer was one of the visits I took my class for a couple of years in the governor’s office and then a speaker at my AIG/ME meetings.
I was arrested three times: Once in Al-Khobar for driving in an extreme right curb where my car was confiscated and I was brought to the ARAMCO gate police to pay an SR 800 fine and more to get my car and license back.



The other was at the airport where I brought in my suitcase a stomach medicine containing alcohol I bought in Vienna at my favorite grocery store. The third was in Riyadh where an army lieutenant hit my car from the rear and where I was able to cruise to my usual parking space ON the side of the Ministry of Interior building in which worked. Fortunately the perpetrator stopped in front of our building which was filled with MOI police and they quickly contacted the city police who arrested the two of us and put us into there squad car to take us top jail. On the way and in the middle of the dessert after the lieutenant confessed that I had done 100% nothing and he everything they stopped the car and commanded me to get out. I did so in the middle of the Riyadh desert, the very spot which is now the where the largest hospital in the kingdom is located. I walked back to my office and proceeded d to see about getting my car fixed and paid for the damages. It turned out that the lieutenant convinced me to release him even though my car was not fixed to my satisfaction saying that he would see to it that they fixed it correctly. He did nothing once he was released and I learned an important and expensive lesson when making agreements In Saudi.


Women in Saudi Arabia:
The Arab News reported on December 1, 2004 "why women’s voting is complicated.
It was both an awful party lines while really spelling out the morass the kingdom faces in such people that promulgate such ideas. The author writes that one reason for not electing a female is because of the presumption that males and female have to be separate that if a female were elected they would have to build a separate building to house her. This is utter nonsense since any female government official is neither male nor female under the Saudi law and is treated with the dignity and respect of her office" . I attended many such meeting meetings with females in KFU under such a protocol.
The writer insists that a more urgent matter be addressed which is that women’s names be allowed to be read in public citing how that wedding innovations are issued by the male and handed to family to conceal the identity of the women.

When teaching in KSA at KFU my female students sat behind a one- way mirror to below ceiling partition with the lights low on there side so they could see and hear me but I could only hear them. I could not call attendance and had a special female assuring me that the class was there. (Huda’s mother)
On the elevator in the BinJuma building I would never ride and elevator with a Saudi lady fearing that she could accuse me of all kinds of things, several times I day at the insistence of some of our neighbors. It was all very awkward and Gothic. The women’s souks were off limits to men except if they were with their wives, family or very old as I later became. Of course servants were allowed to carry stuff and keep their distance. The shopping malls kept women at bay behind special women’s sections. Restaurants forbid women from attending with males unless with a chaperone, but snack and fast food restaurants made exceptions when in open malls and openly seen by the religious police. Saudi women will never shake hands with a man. I would sometime get calls from women trying to meet a man or simply converse which I would simply close and not encourage, occasionally when Christina was out of the kingdom women knocked on my door wanting to be friendly.

Christmas in Saudi Arabia
The first Christmas in Saudi Arabia was spent alone in Bin Jumah building with us standing on our balcony overlooking King Abdul Aziz Blvd.
Wishing and praying because we were alone and not invited to any thing. Several days later we were invited and traveled to Bahrain to spend the holidays in a beautiful hotel and had a grand dinner with all the fixings including a beautiful Indian girl who sold and she lit my cigar after dipping it in Grand Mariner. It was very nice. There was Christmas music and se toured the Island. The Griffith organized the trip. Everything was so special in Saudi about Christmas. We would go to the souks and King Khalid Blvd and Ghazzas to buy gifts including glasses, cloths and carpets.

In the early eighties we invited our ARAMCO group to turkey dinners and later our church groups to dinners.
We shopped in the malls. In 1991 I spent my Christmas in Saudi without Christina and was invited by an American business man ,architect and Yale graduate, Jan to his home for Christmas Eve where his wife and daughter were very hospitable and exchanged gifts. They introduced me to the Christmas dinners at the Corps of Engineer’s Desert Inn at the airport where I later spent many holidays with our groups and friends. The Desert Inn served turkey and ham with all the fixings including a Christmas tree, lights and music. Unfortunately Jan's wife a Lebanese, was so aggressive and hostile, one evening insisting I get her husband a job at the University and challenging why I could be employed at the University and not her husband. Jan and I were always friends but I avoided his wife. Jan later invited me to join him to visit the Prince and royal family for Ramadan holiday. Christmas also meant Christmas plays at the Philippine ministry where I narrated a Christmas play performed at the villa and Beth’s “big-house”. I also learned new British songs at the Ian’s and enjoyed Christmas dinner prepared by his wife and congregation, all of this while Christina was out of the kingdom and I was living with Khalid in Dammam. Howard would pick me up with his car and take me to these events.

In Riyadh we prepared a wonderful Christmas dinner for Alfonso and his secret girl friend attended by Michael and served by Sunan in our El-Seif villa. That Christmas the Pastor of the Saudi a fellowship gave a most memorable preaching on the way the stars aligned with each other to form the bright star which led the Shepherds. It was so propitious because it was our introduction to the charismatic evangelical church of Saudi. I Riyadh we shopped in Ghazzas on Sateen Street and the Riyadh souks. We had found a German bakery so we always had excellent bread and German Cakes. Our FGBMFI made Christmas dinner party at the desert Inn and there was the Christmas choir and performances at the desert Inn and later at the US Embassy. We also attended Christmas celebrations at the Riyadh and Dhahran US consulate.
Those parties included alcoholic beverages and while Bill Brew was in office we were invited to his home for sumptuous Christmas dinner. The Inter coin hotel manager once invited us for a great dinner at his home in Riyadh and the Boyhans invited us fro a proper English dinner at here villa in Seaview. Christmas was always a dangerous time in Saudi because the religious police liked to invade western gatherings.

At King Faisel University I was invited to give a lecture on metaphors to the whole school on Christmas Eve and jested with the Iraqi/American organizer that I’d show up in Santa Claus outfit; he was so worried that I would and kept begging me to reconsider.
Another Christmas I entered a room filled with my Saudi colleagues and quietly wished them a Merry Christmas to which one reprimanded me and warned me not to ever do this again. It was a great lesson in the value and privilege we have in the USA to have the freedom to practice our faith openly. We do not want to ban this practice in the USA. During the time when Christmas coincided with the Ramadan holidays the holidays were particularly festive. There were stores in Khobar, which specialized in selling Christmas cards, treats and lights to us heathen/expats. They had there wares in back rooms, up stairs and hidden from the view of the public and the search of the religious police. It was so interesting to visit their shops. We bought a tree and cards. There was Arab stores, which sold hand painted cards disguised with Arab scenes but writing "merry Christmas" or "seasons greetings".

Our celebrations were usually festive and carried out judiciously. In our Khobar home during the nineties we’d have songbooks prepared and gather in the back prayer room where we’d sing songs accompanied by Christina. Later we’d prey and eat the turkey. The fellowship and camaraderie during these many years in both the Desert Inn Rose, embassies, consulates and our home and villas was wonderful. There were rare occasions when we were able to get out for the holidays to Germany or Kitzbuhel and these were very special as well.
We sometime brought home the US and British military and I met several officers at Ians'.
Later we invited chaplains to our home for Christmas dinner.
I once preached to the soldiers in their underground church for Christmas in Khobar Towers. One Christmas the main streets were decorated with lights and arches over the streets to recognize the king’s visit. Also, light were strung around the Khobar water tower during Christmases. There was always a courtesy paid to us westerners to give us the time off to quietly celebrate. There was nothing said but we all knew.


Several of my employers would openly wish me a Merry Christmas being proud that they could and shared their generosity of spirit with me. The ladies would always make Christmas parties and invite Christina and I to their homes in both Riyadh and Eastern Province.
I especially liked exchanging gifts with Tony from Lebanon and where each of brought gifts and were exchanged them in our home between brothers and sisters from so many countries including Nigeria, India, Philippines, England, ,etc. I recall a Christmas party with our French School master and his wife. There were also nice Christmas parties at the home of Gunther Baer, Manger of the Dhahran International Hotel.

In the mid eighties I was given the name of a Christian brother who was one of the organizers of the orchestra and after a very clandestine conversation he agreed to let me meet him at his office. It was there he invited me to their first concert. The lady who was the music leader of our church group months later organized the Riyadh chorus. Now there are hired and paid conductors and leaders bought in from the outside to do these jobs. Oh yes, there is also a theater group which performs and gives awards to best play, show actor ,etc. called the “desert rose Awards”. Riyadh’s orchestra and choral group was the most spectacular giving Christmas concerts in embassy and other special venues. The British did there share on New Years Eve to give us the flag waving “Night at the Proms” concerts including bagpipes. It seems that westerners did more than they could to recall the holidays in Saudi. It was so precious!

Enforcing dietary Restrictions in Saudi Arabia:
People are arrested at borders, and if not carrying contraband items and not being arrested rejoice as though accomplishing some great work. On the other hand we have been told that so many smuggle bibles, pornography, ham, bacon, alcohol and alcoholic products, dope, marijuana, cocaine, guns, etc. There were raids and inspections as well as border searches and people stopped on streets. The consequences could be imprisonment, deportation, fines, and worse. Even the military, diplomatic and ARAMCO commissaries which were permitted areas were subject to investigations and raids during Christmas celebrations mostly searching to see if native Saudi nationals were participating. Airport and road searches were horrendous and stressful. Christina often brought in bibles and Christian tapes on the top of her goods inside trunks which were generously overlooked by customs.

I once had a bible filled with my notes confiscated and another time arrested for alcoholic stomach medicine I bought in Vienna. However, when we had a fire in our apartment and the fireman and police searched my house while I was absent not a word was mentioned about our many bibles and Christian materials. I even personally went to the neighborhood security inspectors to sign a final release to discuss their search and they were only kind and friendly. We were often given hams and pork products to prepare at home by friends and hid it well in the event our place was searched. I recall living off ARAMCO compound and taking home ham in our car’s trunk fearing we’d be stopped or have an auto accident and then found with this off the ARAMCO permitted grounds. Going from our car to our apartment was just as dangerous and we were very careful. We’d wrap bibles in plain paper and carry them in shopping bags. After a while we learned it was all talk and that house searches were forbidden. In other words if you had something in your home it was accepted. But getting it there was the problem.

Again I can only encourage readers to research the internet for articles published on the internet and the Saudi English language press about arrests, terrorism, women’s rights, etc.
The following Four Footnotes below really show how open the Saudi English press has become about a variety of controversial matters. Most of these I simply cut and pasted from what the Saudi press has published on the internet. Having lived in Saudi a really long time I continue to be pleased they way things are changing. Nothing that I have written is meant to cast dispesiaons upon th kingdom, its religion nor its people. As we leived in KSA for twenty years we learned to respect and case for the place. It is in this spirit of intamacy and happiness I report this all to my readers that you should know the reqalities of this very important nation.


Footnote: #2 (A Saudi Woman’s View of Saudi Behavior)
The following article appeared in the Arab News and so well describes driving, shopping, visiting hospitals, etc.
Queue-Jumping Comes Naturally to Us
Lubna Hussain
She says: "I was standing in line at a check-out counter the other day when I slowly came to the realization that although the queue seemed to be progressing I decidedly wasn’t. The reason was simple. Although I had been sticking to the basic principle of waiting my turn, it seemed that my fellow shoppers were quite ignorant of this concept and kept slipping in ahead of me.

As we were all dressed the same and had few distinguishing external features, other than handbags and children, it was fairly easy to queue-jump inconspicuously” (Christina and I have also experienced the lines at Safeway’s, groceries, airports, Rashid Mall, souks, etc.).
Lubna continues:” n the light of my new discovery and with a keener sense of vigilance I pounced upon a lady (distinguishing feature: Orange handbag) who tried to shove herself in front of me. I explained to her that the reason that I had been standing in the same spot for the past 15 minutes was not due to any spiritual attachment to it, nor of the inability to uproot myself, but because there was a system to be followed so that the process of being served would be rendered more effectively.
She stared at me blankly, looked me up and down with curiosity and proceeded to ignore me whilst resuming the position that she had usurped. All of this without the slightest hesitation or embarrassment. I was furious. Another woman (distinguishing feature: White leather-effect handbag) then barged in front of me. Exasperated, I decided to take action.
The salesman, who had attended my lecture on the great social merits of queuing, then began to “render effective service” to Ms. Orange Handbag.
“When in Rome,” I thought as I aggressively placed my goods on the counter in front of hers, “do as the Romans do.” What then ensued was a united and ferocious attack by Ms. Orange Handbag as to how she had been first and Ms. White Leather-Effect Handbag as to how I was just pushing in.
To add insult to injury, the salesman (by this time an ace student in the fundamentals of standing in line) declared, “Execyooz me, but there is a queue!” Such basic lack of consideration is evident in much of the Eastern Hemisphere.
And then again, there are of course those unwritten rules, especially practiced at airports, whereby queue barging is dependent upon nationality and social status. I have been witness to several acts of racial discrimination standing in line at Immigration and Customs where officials have alighted upon individuals with Caucasian features and singled them out for deferential treatment by sending them to the front of the queue. And what of their poor dark-skinned cousins?
Well, if they don’t queue properly they are sent to the back of the line with a similar lack of reverence reserved for errant schoolchildren.

I will never forget one incident in particular during Ramadan when someone of Indian origin was standing at the wrong counter meant for GCC passport holders. This was not done in order to get ahead, but most certainly out of genuine ignorance.
In what I felt was an outrageous miscarriage of justice; the immigration officer banished the Indian to the back of the longest line. This in spite of the fact that he had been waiting his turn for quite a while just likes everybody else. The same official did not bat an eye when three UK passport holders presented themselves at his counter shortly afterward in a very obvious effort to avoid the lengthy wait altogether.
Most disturbing of all, and often with fatal consequences, is the flagrant lack of adherence to queuing in an orderly fashion on the roads. In order to avoid being stuck in a traffic jam, many drivers wishing to go straight, left or any foreseeable way other than right block the right-hand lane causing further congestion. All sorts of daring driving techniques are practiced in the name of moving one car ahead, irrespective of the danger or inconvenience caused to others.”

My favorite in Riyadh is when extreme left hand lane coming to exit on right cuts across three lanes to exit and extreme right hand lane does the same. At the old airport I would join the throng at the counter pitching my hand with money or ticket, or boarding pass to hopefully be caught by the attendant. No one got angry, upset, or nasty; every one just thronged and hopes to be next.
At the supermarkets I learned to expect and predict behaviors and to change lanes or wait when the predictable occurred. Especially cute was when women would haggle with the cashier about the prices or simply try to bargain. Occasionally the manger would acquiesce and simply discount the total purchase. What fun! The hospital was also predictable so I would show up early and queue. The system was designed for irregularities and each of us given a number to be called when our folders were ready. Once the folder was ready we changed places to the clinic where our folder was placed on the door of the doctor to be visited. Usually the nurse would make sure none tampered with the folders.

















Footnote: #4: Murthy’s email
The below email from Murthy explains some of the holidays celebrated at our home later in AlKhobar.
PRAISE THE LORD: 21.12.04
RESPECTED SIR/MAMDAME.
WISH U A HAPPY CHRISTMAS
AND WELCOME FOR THE PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR 2005
AND MANY MORE HAPPY RETURNS FOR BROTHER BARIES BIRTHDAY - 28-12-2004
ALL ARE GOING WELL ..THANX FOR UR MESSAGE
FOR THANKS GIVING DAY AND FOR THE CHRISTMAS GREETINGS
GOD WILL GET US TOGETHER . I WILL REMEMBER THE DAY IN SAUDI ., AT CHRISTMAS TIME WE ENJOY AND CELEBRATE AND ALL OUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS GET TOGETHER AND SHARE THE TURKEY DINNER . WE ALSO SERVE TO GOD BY ICI AND BIBLE STUDIES ... I NEVER FORGET THAT DAYS WITH U IN SAUDI ,, THAT'S A GOLDEN DAYS FOR ME ...THANKS TO GOD ..CHRISTMAS TIME .. MY FAMILY MEMBERS ALL ARE GOING TO THE CHURCH AND PREY FOR THE WORLD PEACE ... PLEASE SEND UR REPLY..
THANKING YOU
YOURS LOVINGLY
MURTHY AND FAMILY
HAPPY NEW YEAR TOO FROM PKMURTHY AND FAMILY,alKhobar, Arabs, ARAMCO, barie fez-barringten, chicken, Corniche, Corniche/Strand, Dow, kebobs, Khoderi Building, metaphors, Rashid mall, riyadh, Safeway, sand, Shammal, souks, thobs,
alKhobar, Arabs, ARAMCO, barie fez-barringten, chicken, Corniche, Corniche/Strand, Dow, kebobs, Khoderi Building, metaphors, Rashid mall, riyadh, Safeway, sand, Shammal, souks, thobs